Sunday, August 29, 2010

15 minutes of my life have been wasted...

thanks to Aelianus. It's been bothering me for a while, ever since his anti-scientist rant a few weeks ago.

His rant was rather funny, and the only annoying thing about it was the little jab about scientists holed up watching "Red Dwarf" DVD's. I thought, if it's good enough for English scientists, it must be good enough for me. Netflix happened to have the series on Instant View, so I started watching. I turned off the pilot after 15 minutes that I will never get back.

One of my favorite movies is "The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind." I agreed with the movie's conclusion that even painful memories are worth keeping. I have changed my mind. If memory-wiping technology is ever invented, I will pay to use it to have all remaining vestiges of the first 15 minutes of the "Red Dwarf" pilot erased from my mind. I have been trying to shove it down into the recesses of my subconscious, but fear it may now begin to haunt my dreams.

It is a terrible show. It has a laugh-track, or at least I hope it does. If it was filmed in front of a live studio audience, I can only explain the incessant laughter in 2 ways.

Option 1) The audience was high, either because the studio handed out marijuana to its audience members or let them bring their own. The studio must have been fairly cheap; they can't have paid the set designers or writers very well, so I would vote for the BYOW option.

Option 2) the live studio was in a psych ward. It would have to have been in a non-violent psych ward, or the inanity of the show would have led to the deaths of all cast and crew.

I have been enchanted with dead and dying stars since I was six years old. I still am because they are TEH GRAETIEST. Nice try, England. I know you were all jealous about the lunar landings, and I guess this was your convoluted form of revenge (*cough* a dish you apparently think best served tepid), but not even your televised lunacy can destroy the wonders of the night sky. You took 15 minutes of my life, but you can't take that away from me.

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